Shit, I almost did this just the other day…

This article explains a suit Kristina Roberts has filed against her boss, Jorge Garcia. It seems Mr. Garcia jizzed on Ms. Roberts. He says it was consensual but she claims otherwise. Really, these two paragraphs are all the explanation needed:

“Kristina Roberts, 37, claims she was alone at JEG Advertising with her new boss on Sept. 9 when he approached her while holding his penis.

‘Plaintiff was sitting at her desk doing the work she was given earlier that day when Mr. Garcia came up behind her,’ her civil suit says. ‘He asked Ms. Roberts to turn around, and when she did, defendant proceeded to ejaculate onto her and her clothing. Mr. Garcia apologized and stated that he did not mean to do that.’”

Seriously, who knows if this dude is guilty or not? It could be that they were fooling around (consensually) and now she’s seen an opportunity to extort some cash from the guy. However, if she is telling the truth, this could be a very simple explanation for all of this. I mean seriously, just the other day I was walking around the office with my cock out of my pants – I was hard and close to coming too. I just narrowly avoided getting the mess on one of my co-workers. This guy’s claim that he “did not mean to do that” is totally plausible.

Totally.