El gigante es muerte!

The United States has clinched a spot in the 2006 World Cup finals thanks to a 2-0 victory on Saturday. Qualifying for the World Cup is always a big deal but this victory was particularly sweet due to the fact that it came against our main rivals: the backward shithole of a country known as Mexico.

There are few things in the sporting world that I hate as much as Mexican soccer and, conversely, few things that bring me as much pleasure as beating them. The whole bunch of them are a gang of shit-talking retards and cheap shot artists. When their loss was all but assured against us in the 2002 World Cup, their hard tackles started to border on assault. After the game concluded, instead of trading shirts with the US, they players refused to participate in the tradition and turned tail and stomped back to their locker rooms. Fuck them if they can’t take their beating with dignity.

I reckon a large part of their animosity towards us stems from the fact that they are now inferior to the United States in every aspect of their existence. They look to their northern border and see a country that is more prosperous, more influential and offers better opportunities to its citizens than their own country. Their citizens are so desperate to escape their own country, much like rats on a sinking ship, that they risk DEATH crossing our deserts just to pick lettuce or work jobs at less than minimum wage. The ONE SINGLE THING that they could do better than the U.S. was play soccer. And that is no longer true. Let’s look at our soccer results since the turn of the century:

• June 11, 2000 – 3-0 victory for the United States (East Rutherford, NJ)
• October 25, 2000 – 2-0 victory for the United States (Los Angeles, CA)
• February 28, 2001 – 2-0 victory for the United States (Columbus, OH)
• July 1, 2001 – 1-0 victory for Mexico (Mexico City, Mexico)
• April 3, 2002 – 1-0 victory for the United States (Denver, CO)
• June 17, 2002 – 2-0 victory for the United States (Jeonju, South Korea [World Cup])
• May 8, 2003 – 0-0 Tie (Houston, TX)
• April 28, 2004 – 1-0 victory for the United States (Dallas, TX)
• March 27, 2005 – 2-1 victory for Mexico (Mexico City, Mexico)
• September 3, 2005 – 2-0 victory for the United States (Columbus, OH)

That’s a record of 7-1-2 and a +11 goal differential over a five year span. The only place they have a chance against us is Estadio Azteca, one of the most intimidating venues in the entire world. Mexico hasn’t managed to score a single goal on the United States anywhere except Mexico City in a 5+ year span. That one thing that they could point to with pride, the one thing they were better than the United States at has been taken away from them. Landon Donovan has had the most to say on the situation: “ I think that's what angers them about us. We have lives beyond soccer. For a lot of them they don't, players, coaches, people in Mexico, that's what they have. It's almost what makes it sweeter to beat them.” Indeed Landon.

He also answers the question of who’s best in the region quite nicely: “No matter how many time you beat them its always 'who’s the best team in CONCACAF.' Why don't you look at the results? It's pretty clear. That's why they're talking and say what they do, because they can't do it on the field.”

What exactly are “they” saying? Well, there’s Luis Hernandez telling Donovan that he would find his (Donovan’s) mother and kill her during the loss in the 2002 World Cup. Or there are the comments that goalie Oswaldo Sanchez made about Donovan’s mother in a magazine interview. Or there are coach Ricardo LaVolpe’s comments after Saturday’s loss, “Here, everyone's interested in baseball and American football and many people didn't even know that a soccer match was being played today. So it's easy for them, because they aren't playing under any pressure. My mother, my grandmother or my great grandmother could play in a team like that."

Is that right Ricardo? Could they dominate your sorry ass too?

LaVolpe does make an interesting point though – one the rest of the world should take notice of: soccer IS NOT the primary sport in the United States and we aren’t fielding the best athletes in our country. America is barely emerging as a soccer power. Most kids that have athletic skills are shepherded into other sports such as football, baseball or basketball. Imagine Terrell Owens as a target man on a set piece or Allen Iverson as a shifty midfielder. I’m not knocking our current squad – they have more than proven themselves capable in international and club competition – I’m just pointing out that we lose quality athletes to other sports whereas soccer is the ONLY option in a whole lot of other players. Things are changing though and there are certainly good times ahead for United States soccer fans.

As for Mexico? "They suck." Donovan later added, "Hopefully this shuts them up for the next four years." He later told the Mexican press, “I just hate all the talking, all the blah blah they always talk. (Mexicans) think they're the best, even though we've beaten them over and over.”

Not only has our quality of play improved dramatically, we have young players coming up to sustain this rise to prominence. But, perhaps most importantly, the American soccer players’ attitudes are coming around as well. Like I said, good times are ahead for United States soccer fans.