New Mexico's not that cool...
Ricky got accepted to the Border Patrol academy recently, hooray for him. This will be his second time after his previous try was cut short by a knee injury. Anyhow, he left Wednesday on a government charted bus. What does this have to do with me? I, along with my brother Stevie, was to deliver his car to him Saturday so he can get around fabulous Artesia for the duration of his stay.
The plan was for me to drive my car up there, followed by Stevie in Rick’s car. We would drive up, deliver the car and then Stevie and I would both head back in my car. Frankly, I can imagine better ways to spend a Saturday but whatever – it would be an adventure.
We left Tucson at 08:30 and after a couple of hours we were in NM. It wasn’t too long before I realized a simple fact: New Mexico pretty much sucks. We didn’t pass through Albuquerque or Santa Fe so I’ll have to withhold final judgment on the state as a whole but Las Cruces and Alamogordo made Wickenburg and Kingman, AZ look cosmopolitan. As a matter of fact, I made it my business to improve the smell and level of class in Las Cruces by dropping a deuce there.
The only interesting areas that we passed through were the White Sands Missile Range and Holloman AFB. White Sands is where the first atomic device was detonated and it was honestly kinda cool to drive through the range. After a while though, I found myself thinking that it was appropriate that they would choose to nuke this crappy state. Holloman was noteworthy because it’s the home of the F-117 stealth fighter. And the German Air Force’s Tactical Training Center. Say what? Over 300 German Air Force members are permanently assigned to the base. Germany’s been very critical of the US’ application of force in other parts of the world but apparently they aren’t outraged enough to stop using our military facilities…
We continued through to Artesia and words cannot adequately describe how shitty that place is. Why on earth would the US Border Patrol choose to put their academy there? I thought it unnecessary that Ricky would need a car because there’s nothing to see or do there. But I figure his vehicle will come in handy for escaping that rat hole on weekends or whenever else the chance presents itself.
We were treated to a brief tour of the academy grounds and then got back in the car and repeated the 7-hour journey. Stevie and I spent 16 hours on the road that day, including brief stops for gas and food, etc. I’m in no hurry to go back to NM. Ricky, you still owe me. Bastard.
The plan was for me to drive my car up there, followed by Stevie in Rick’s car. We would drive up, deliver the car and then Stevie and I would both head back in my car. Frankly, I can imagine better ways to spend a Saturday but whatever – it would be an adventure.
We left Tucson at 08:30 and after a couple of hours we were in NM. It wasn’t too long before I realized a simple fact: New Mexico pretty much sucks. We didn’t pass through Albuquerque or Santa Fe so I’ll have to withhold final judgment on the state as a whole but Las Cruces and Alamogordo made Wickenburg and Kingman, AZ look cosmopolitan. As a matter of fact, I made it my business to improve the smell and level of class in Las Cruces by dropping a deuce there.
The only interesting areas that we passed through were the White Sands Missile Range and Holloman AFB. White Sands is where the first atomic device was detonated and it was honestly kinda cool to drive through the range. After a while though, I found myself thinking that it was appropriate that they would choose to nuke this crappy state. Holloman was noteworthy because it’s the home of the F-117 stealth fighter. And the German Air Force’s Tactical Training Center. Say what? Over 300 German Air Force members are permanently assigned to the base. Germany’s been very critical of the US’ application of force in other parts of the world but apparently they aren’t outraged enough to stop using our military facilities…
We continued through to Artesia and words cannot adequately describe how shitty that place is. Why on earth would the US Border Patrol choose to put their academy there? I thought it unnecessary that Ricky would need a car because there’s nothing to see or do there. But I figure his vehicle will come in handy for escaping that rat hole on weekends or whenever else the chance presents itself.
We were treated to a brief tour of the academy grounds and then got back in the car and repeated the 7-hour journey. Stevie and I spent 16 hours on the road that day, including brief stops for gas and food, etc. I’m in no hurry to go back to NM. Ricky, you still owe me. Bastard.
posted by Sivlitz at 8:28 PM
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